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Gentle Care

The way I care for the person who has died is at the heart of everything I do and I put a lot of love in to it.

- Kerry Aldridge

I believe that everyone is entitled to kind, gentle care after death and that their body should be treated with the same amount of respect and integrity as it would if the person was alive.

You can take comfort from knowing that I care for the person in the same way as I would want to be cared for and certainly how I would want my own loved ones cared for.

Most importantly, I care for them in accordance with your, or their, wishes.  Where I have had the opportunity to meet the person prior to their death, I always ask how they want to be cared for after they die.

I understand how important it is for families to know who will be caring for their loved one and how they will be treated.  I can also support family and friends to be involved in the care of their loved one, should they wish.

Alternatively, I will arrange for others to assist and, together, we will carry out the care gently and with the utmost dignity.

At Hand in Hand Funerals, I care for the person in the same way as I would if I had encountered them on a hospital ward or in a hospice bed and believe that the same ethics and principles of consent should be applied after death, as they are in life.

For this reason, I do not routinely embalm or carry out any other invasive practices.  I will only consider these if requested to do so and only once we are confident it is an informed request.

In essence, I continue to honour the person who has died.

Should I feel that something could be done to support the body, I will always discuss this sensitively with the next of kin first.  After all, it is your loved one, I am simply caring for them.

Having trained with some of the leading experts in this field, you can be assured that each person will receive the most natural, compassionate care possible.

In most cases, we will gently wash and dry the person’s body and dress them according to your, or their, wishes.  Or it may be that you prefer no care is carried out and your loved one is left to rest in their natural state.

I will guide you in what is possible and support you to do what is right for you, as I know the comfort this can bring.

Being able to care for the person who has died can bring the most profound comfort and can feel like your last act of love for the person you have lost. 

Continuing to care for them can be incredibly beneficial to your own health and well-being, allowing you time to process your loss whilst enabling you to maintain your connection with your loved one.  This in itself can have a hugely positive impact on your grief.

Whilst, for some, it can feel perfectly natural to be involved in someone’s care when they die, particularly if they were involved in the person’s care when they were alive.  For others, it can feel daunting but if you feel you would like to be involved, please be reassured that I will be there to support you.

It may be that you just wish to be present while we provide the care, or you would like to carry out small gestures, such as combing their hair or ensuring that their clothing lies perfectly. 

Whatever you feel comfortable with, I will support you in every way I can.

If it is important to you, it is important to us and whether you wish to be involved or not, I promise that your loved one will receive the very best care possible.